Breathe Love concrit meme

[aeroport_art]

Hey babes! Fill this out and I'll love you forever. And then I'll write better stories because of it and then you can love me forever back. Happy family, no?

Concrit Meme

Instructions: If you've read the completed story, go ahead and reply to this in the comments! Feel free to pick and choose the questions you want to answer. Be as brutal or detailed as you want, this is constructive criticism at work and unexplained compliments or complaints should be posted elsewhere. If you're an author of a completed fic, feel free to repost this meme in your own journal.

1. Name your favorite scene(s), and why.

2. Name your least favorite scene(s), and why.

3. Which scene moved you the most?

4. Describe an aspect of the writing technique that you enjoy.

5. Describe an aspect of the writing technique that could use improvement.

6. If you could change something about Breathe Love, what would it be? Why?

7. What is/are your favorite quote(s)? Why?

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These are more BL-centric.

8. Was there enough development of auxilary characters (ie Veronica, LJ) or did you want to see more of them?

9. Honestly... were the sex scenes hot or not? I've read so much fandom porn that half the stuff I read nowadays is just going through the motions, so it would be helpful to know if BL falls in that category or not.

10. I feel like a personal weakness is in pushing the plot along too quickly. Were there any scenes you feel like ended too abruptly, or would have been more powerful had they been extended?

Alright, that is all. *sits back and waits nervously*

Comments

[tabularassa.livejournal.com]

1. Name your favorite scene(s), and why.

My favorite scene has got to be in Chapter 4, when Lincoln and Michael finally express their love conscioulsy, knowing that what they are doing isn't right, but they do it anyways because they love each other so much. You wrote the whole thing so well, how Michael made him a birthday dinner, and how upset he was when Mikey was late and then Michael getting on his knees in front of him and Linclon picking him up by the armpits like a puppy dog. Too fucking adorable. I loved the fact that when you were writing from Michael's perspective, in his head, Mikey kept referring to Linclon as "his Lincoln". Totally fucking dead on.

2. Name your least favorite scene(s), and why.
Hmm...I don't really have a least favorite scene. I love-hate the angst that happens but its part of what thrills me too. As far as a scene that you wrote, no, I think everything flows well together.

3. Which scene moved you the most?
The scene that moved me the most was when they were both on top of Lisa's house and it was cold and they snuggled together and it was like they silently agreed that they couldn't fight or escape their love for each other, so they just gave in. It was lovely.

4. Describe an aspect of the writing technique that you enjoy.
I love how everything just fits so well together. You make it flow and I'm not a writer so that is an ability I greatly admire.

5. Describe an aspect of the writing technique that could use improvement.
I would say that the only 2 things that need improvement are your grammar and the fact that sometimes you jump back and forth , be it with characters or time periods, but its a slight thing and you've mostly corrected all that.

6. If you could change something about Breathe Love, what would it be? Why?
*see above* Also, I would have liked to see them have a longer relationship as teenagers. You know, how when they were practically a married couple and Linc went to his school and they lived together in blissful, sexy harmony? More of that would have been cool, but no biggie:)

7. What is/are your favorite quote(s)? Why?
Its not really a quote, its the last line. I know I keep leaning towards the sex parts, but again, back to chapter 4, when Lincoln has his fingers in Michaels mouth and he says something along the lines of, "That's it, Mikey, get them wet. You know where they're going." For some reason I remember that line.

8. Was there enough development of auxilary characters (ie Veronica, LJ) or did you want to see more of them?
I think you did an excellent job with the auxilary characters. Not too much and not too little. Just right. We didn't really need to know Veronica's whole life story. lol

9. Honestly... were the sex scenes hot or not? I've read so much fandom porn that half the stuff I read nowadays is just going through the motions, so it would be helpful to know if BL falls in that category or not.
Mmm..fucking HOT! Hot, hot, hot. I have read my share of fandom sex scenes and the ones in these story are some of my favorites. I love how you use such tender words and then you throw in the word "asshole" and the phrase "sucking dick" in there. lmao Seriously, your shit is smokin' hot.

10. I feel like a personal weakness is in pushing the plot along too quickly. Were there any scenes you feel like ended too abruptly, or would have been more powerful had they been extended?
Like I said above, I would have loved to see more of their relationship as teenagers and I guess also as adults, before everything went to shit and that Texan started fucking everything up. Hopefully you will make up for that in the epilogue;) Muck love to you:)

[aeroport_art.livejournal.com]

Thanks for filling it out babe! It helps my writing a lot to know what people like or don't like XD

[tabularassa.livejournal.com]

You are welcome! I'm glad I was of assistance:)